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I Apologize

by Dee-1on LOADED

This for the sons with no father figures in their life

This for the baby mothers who never gon be a wife

This for the (daughters) (girls) who lost their innocence to the streets

This for the brothers in them trenches where it ain’t no peace

I forgot to call & check on you like i was ‘posed to

I forgot to help you take some weight off yo shoulders

I forgot to give you love when that’s what you lacked

I forgot to pray for you when the Devil attacked

I really wish that i could take away all of your stressing

I really wish that i could turn your pain into blessings

I really wish i could deliver you from all the drama

I really wish that i could heal you, from all yo trauma

I’m finding balance, tryna learn how to love better

Tryna make life for the ex-cons and thugs better

We underdogs and outcasts, we love pressure

This deeper than a rap song, this a love letter

I apologize for the way the world made me

I turned my back on your attention, should've gave it to my baby

Seen a lot of wrong and blamed it on the Devil

Pain the only thing the streets ever gave me

I seen em put that dirt on top of you with shovels

Lord knows I had the chance, you'd be right with me

I got a heart full of tears

I just ain’t cried yet

My uncle told me that we’re dead, we just ain’t died yet

We in a spiritual war; mentally i’m gettin tired

Playing chess against myself, trying not to root for either side

It’s depressing when i’m passing thru my block

I done took so many losses, i lost my way to the top

The streets had me in a dark place that was sunken

Too young to realize, i was functioning in dysfunction

Everybody was thuggin; Angry, violent, & Broke

Been sleepin on me forever, but steady claiming they're woke/

It was rare that i spoke, constantly losing hope/

Laughing to keep from crying so it was often we joked

Let’s go…. Cuz time after time i done been denied

But i ain’t got nothin to lose, so i ain’t got no pride