Behold, the eighth wonder of the natural world!

Come one and come all, see the two-headed girl

Stupendous! Revolting!

You’ll be shocked, you’ll be awed!

A true freak of nature, a blunder of God!

But possessing such talents

Hear them sing, see them dance

As seen in the highest class parlors of France

Just ten bucks a photograph

Get your seats while they last

We take Visa and MasterCard, debit or cash

Isn’t it nice that they’re being so nice to us?

If I’m not mistaken, I think they might like us

Aren’t we lucky to be here?

Stop moving, they’re taking a picture

Smile for the camera, Evelyn

Come in, come in, must be cold out there gentlemen

Take off your coats, and just guess what the wind blew in

I know you like twins, have I got a surprise

They’re identical sisters attached at the side

Just imagine the fun you could have with these chicklets

And they’re so well-behaved, not a single complaint yet

Just look at these photographs, while I pour you a cocktail

I don’t know whether I should charge double or triple!

Isn’t it nice that they’re being so nice to us?

If I’m not mistaken, I think they might like us

Aren’t we lucky to be here?

Stop moving, they’re taking a picture

Smile for the camera, Evelyn

Ladies and gentlemen, critics and hipsters

Have you heard the new disc by the Evelyn sisters?

Seamlessly floating with grace between eras and genres

They sing timeless new songs, rife with double entendres

As featured in Rolling Stone, Spin, The New Yorker and Pitchfork (Pitchfork!)

There’s an in-store appearance today at the corner of Bedford and Seventh Ave., some get a photograph, sticker and autographed shirt

Isn’t it nice that they’re being so nice to us?

If I’m not mistaken, I think they might like us

Aren’t we lucky to be here?

Stop moving, they’re taking a picture

Smile for the camera, Evelyn